Imagine our elation when we found ourselves pregnant again, but only told a handful of people, for fear of that dreaded not past the first trimester risk. We were optimistic when two weeks ago our ultrasound showed the gestational sac. Last week, we saw the fetus, fetal pole and yolk sac, but no heartbeat - but doctor said to come back again this week because a week makes a huge difference. Today we went back and there has been no growth and no heart beat. We have lost a second pregnancy. Now I can wait to see if my body takes care of it naturally or have an out-patient surgical procedure to remove it and have it tested for chromosomal abnormalities. We're going for the later - since its been two in a row, we would like to know what's going on. So now I am waiting for the surgical scheduler to call - - so I know when this will take place.
The doctor said not to give up hope. The good news is, we can get pregnant - we just need to figure out why we can't carry the baby to term. I've told him I think I want to wait until after the holiday season to try again - give ourselves a break. He thought that was a good idea just told us not to wait too long. Said we could still try on our own with out the fertility drugs until we're ready to come back. Statistically - women get pregnant again within six months of a miscarriage and carry to term. I'm proof, because it only took two months for me. So we wait and see.
Our other options are to use a surrogate with our egg and sperm, but we're talking just as much as having IVF ourselves at $20,000 up front in cash - no payments. The other, is adoption, which can cost between $10k to $30k depending on the agency we use. I was just looking at a facilitators page and they charge $12,500 just to help match you with a birth parent.
All I can say is I'm frustrated, as is Tim. I don't know if I can go through this again - - maybe when I have a better outlook, I don't know.
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